When Andrew was small and we would go on walks, I would come home with a pocketful of stones, pebbles, and sometimes even asphalt. Andrew would pick somethingup from the ground, find some redeeming quality in it, and hand it to me to keep. And I would. Until we got home and I would throw it all away - save one or two if they were pretty enough - until the next walk.
Just the other day I found a small pebble in the pocket of a coat that I hadn't worn in a while. I smiled, and then, naturally, I teared up. I began to think of the days of walking with Andrew and his gathering of the stones and handing them to me. And then I realized that now that he's gotten older he will more than likely not be handing me stones or rocks or pebbles or asphalt anymore. He's too old for that, I thought. That part of his childhood has come and gone. Those are simply memories now. I hate thinking of things like that. Sure, there are things I'm GLAD he's outgrown - diapers, crying in the middle of the night. But there are other things that I simply miss. And as ridiculous as it sounds, I miss those pebbles and stones from the ground.
Today was my first day off since January 23rd. And it's my first session since Andrew was born that I've worked every day of what is affectionately known as "crunch". During crunch, there are so many LRs requested that the only way to make the deadline is to work EVERY DAY without a break until the deadline passes. It tends to be a 3-week period. When I returned to work from maternity leave with Andrew and each crunch after I would work only one day of the weekend and then take one day off - typically Sunday. I couldn't bear to be without my family for those days. But I hated to think of my husband struggling those two days alone. This is the first year that I've been in charge during crunch and felt it my duty to go in every day with the rest of the editors. It was a struggle, but I managed. And somehow, Christopher managed too.
In his first day of freedom, Christopher went off and worked with a his friends on their pet project. I was left alone with the boys. I couldn't wait. What will we do first? It was my first day off in several weeks and I had huge ideas.
After about 2 hours of their boundless energy driving me crazy, I thought we'd try something new - I've spent the majority of my life living near Tuckahoe State Park and I've never really explored it. We were off.
The trails around the adkins arboretum were awesome (once we finally got through the welcome center of which the volunteer was VERY proud. I digress). We walked and walked (and probably walked a little too far). But along the way, Andrew picked up so many stones. And rocks. And pebbles. And giant leaves.
And Davis picked up so many pine cones. And sticks.
And they both wanted to talk about them. And look at them. And have their pictures taken with them.
My pockets were so full, nothing else would fit.
Not even the smile on my face.
Damn these boys make me proud. How do mothers of children who actually do something - like real accomplishments. Like get elected to office. Or return a touchdown in the NFL. How do THOSE mothers contain the pride they must have? I'm in awe with my children when they find a beautiful stone or a dead maple leaf on the ground.
Just the other day I found a small pebble in the pocket of a coat that I hadn't worn in a while. I smiled, and then, naturally, I teared up. I began to think of the days of walking with Andrew and his gathering of the stones and handing them to me. And then I realized that now that he's gotten older he will more than likely not be handing me stones or rocks or pebbles or asphalt anymore. He's too old for that, I thought. That part of his childhood has come and gone. Those are simply memories now. I hate thinking of things like that. Sure, there are things I'm GLAD he's outgrown - diapers, crying in the middle of the night. But there are other things that I simply miss. And as ridiculous as it sounds, I miss those pebbles and stones from the ground.
Today was my first day off since January 23rd. And it's my first session since Andrew was born that I've worked every day of what is affectionately known as "crunch". During crunch, there are so many LRs requested that the only way to make the deadline is to work EVERY DAY without a break until the deadline passes. It tends to be a 3-week period. When I returned to work from maternity leave with Andrew and each crunch after I would work only one day of the weekend and then take one day off - typically Sunday. I couldn't bear to be without my family for those days. But I hated to think of my husband struggling those two days alone. This is the first year that I've been in charge during crunch and felt it my duty to go in every day with the rest of the editors. It was a struggle, but I managed. And somehow, Christopher managed too.
In his first day of freedom, Christopher went off and worked with a his friends on their pet project. I was left alone with the boys. I couldn't wait. What will we do first? It was my first day off in several weeks and I had huge ideas.
After about 2 hours of their boundless energy driving me crazy, I thought we'd try something new - I've spent the majority of my life living near Tuckahoe State Park and I've never really explored it. We were off.The trails around the adkins arboretum were awesome (once we finally got through the welcome center of which the volunteer was VERY proud. I digress). We walked and walked (and probably walked a little too far). But along the way, Andrew picked up so many stones. And rocks. And pebbles. And giant leaves.
And Davis picked up so many pine cones. And sticks.
And they both wanted to talk about them. And look at them. And have their pictures taken with them.
My pockets were so full, nothing else would fit.
Not even the smile on my face.
Damn these boys make me proud. How do mothers of children who actually do something - like real accomplishments. Like get elected to office. Or return a touchdown in the NFL. How do THOSE mothers contain the pride they must have? I'm in awe with my children when they find a beautiful stone or a dead maple leaf on the ground.